Return to the InterwebsTuesday, March 25, 2014
Well, I fell off the face of the blogging world. I received an email that was accidentally filed away under junk with a notification that my blog domain name was about to be cancelled due to a renewal issue. Suffice to say, it gave me a jolt to the fact that I have been completely absent from my beloved blog.
I actually do a great deal of personal writing. Between my crazy job as a retail manager and the million other things I do, it just became difficult to return to my writing in this space. I really haven't even been reading my favorite blogs either. I have a strange compulsion to be all or nothing. If I can't dedicate my all into something, it generally falls to the wayside. I am also a perfectionist and the energy I spend trying to make everything perfect is always exhausting.
One of my friends mentioned that she really missed reading my posts the other day while we were chatting. It made me realize that I really miss writing. So I just logged in to my blog, made sure to update my domain renewal, and decided to was time for me to start writing again. Because it really does make my life fuller and happier when I am writing on a daily basis.
I have been working as a store manager at a beauty store for more than half a year. It's been a struggle to obtain my teaching certification and use my Bachelor's degree. I graduated from college in 2012, took a job as a clinical support representative for a home health agency, and began a very miserable person. The transition out of college has been a difficult one for me. My husband is currently working on a second Master's degree in speech pathology. He is absolutely not help in dealing with this because he still has another year of school left.
After a year of working for the home health agency, I decided to find a job with more income. I also enrolled in a teacher certification program. My current job is a blessing and a curse. At times, I feel that my artistic soul may be suffering. Constantly interacting with rude individuals often wares on me. I am not always able to put on a happy face for ungrateful and entitled customers.
On the flip side, I often enjoy working in a store dedicated to beauty and making women feel good about themselves. Many of my co-workers are very talented and it is an enjoyment to see an overjoyed customer leave the store. I have also lost almost 35 lbs since I have started working in a more physical job. I continuously tell myself that every job comes with good and bad aspects. It's important to focus on the positive and let go of the negative.
My biggest challenge when it comes to writing is finding my voice and organizing my thoughts. Sometimes I struggle because I start out with numerous ideas and they become disorganized as I write. So, my main purpose in writing at the moment is to put aside my reservations and to have a more confident and honest voice.
As a Theatre scholar, it is my nature to seek honesty and ponder the complexities of the human condition. As a writer, I would like to be more vulnerable and unrehearsed in my thoughts. This may prove to be extremely difficult because I am in the habit of accusing myself of rambling whenever I start to express any thoughts in detail.
If you can't tell, I am very hard on myself. The urge to be critical of myself is almost overwhelming at times. It's almost like it was put in my internal code to overanalyze and nitpick at myself all the time. I hope I am not the one person to feel this way. That would be sad.
As always, my main purpose is to inspire positivity and encourage others to live with gratitude. The heart and soul of my blog will not change. I am very happy to be writing again. I really cannot express how overjoyed my heart is right now.
Hope you have an AMAZING week!